We have now been in Arizona for over one month.  Phil has started school and is getting into the swing of things. He likes some of his classes, and others not so much (as is always the case for anybody). He's already really busy and I'm sure is only going to get busier. Everyone tells me I won't see much of him for the next two years, and I'm starting to believe it.

Unfortunately, I still haven't found a job. Honestly, I feel really lame. Its not like I haven't been trying.  I apply for jobs every day. And I have sort of had some leads.  A few interviews, a few phone calls, but nothing promising. Its frustrating to think that I just spent all that time getting my degree and yet it doesn't seem to be helping at all.  I know that if I really wanted to I could probably go get a job at a retail store or at a restaurant.  But, I have been holding out hoping I would find something better.  I would much prefer working in an office over serving people food (not that there is anything wrong with that) and having a regular work schedule.

It would also be nice to make more than minimum wage.

Well, I'm not sure what is going to happen now.  We felt fine about holding out, giving me some time to find a good job that I liked.  But now I'm starting to feel worried. I can't hold out forever. I refuse to use student loan money to pay our bills, and our checking account is starting to look a little droopy. I'm giving myself another two weeks tops.  If nothing really promising comes up, then I guess Chili's will be getting another server.

Trash and Treasure

Do you remember when you were in elementary school and someone would ask you who your favorite teacher was?  and it was always the teacher you had that year?  When you were in first grade it was your first grade teacher, in second your second grade teacher, and so on.  But, that all changed for me when I hit fourth grade.  Mrs. Finley was my favorite teacher that year, and the year after that, and the year after that.  15 years later she is still my favorite teacher. She was so creative and I still remember things I learned and activities we did as if they were yesterday. 

We memorized a lot, but not just times tables or spelling words, we memorized poems like "Sea Fever" by John Masefield, and speeches from Shakespeare, and the Gettysburg Address, and the Preamble to the Constitution.  Mrs. Finley taught us manners.  And I don't just mean she reminded us to say "may I go to the bathroom" instead of "can I go to the bathroom"  I mean she set up a full size table in her classroom set with plates and cups and fancy silverware and we sat down at it and learned proper etiquette.  We studied Ellis Island, and then recreated it.  We all were given characters to play and had to come to school dressed as if we were immigrants from our respective countries migrating to America.  I was Bridget O'Reilly from Ireland.  I had two sets of twins (I had to borrow some dolls from my friends and carry them to school) but my husband had died.  We all had to pack suitcases and bring them to school and Mrs. Finley would search them as if she was a real guard at Ellis Island.  Some students were inspected and told they had a disease and could not enter.  One was found to have silverware in her suitcase and was accused of stealing it. We had to recite the Pledge of Allegiance and Preamble and know all kinds of facts about America to be allowed to come in.  I learned way more that day than I would have just reading a book. 

I could go on and on about all the incredible things she did to peak our learning, but this post is already getting a bit lengthy and I do actually have a point. 

So what is bringing on all this nostalgia you ask?

One of our projects was this:

Yes, that's right.  Each of us made an entire doll house out of, basically stuff people throw away, in fourth grade, in a matter of weeks.  This one is mine.

The dollhouse (the boys made castles, by the way) was inspired by the early 1900's Victorian Era. 

This is the nursery. The bed is made of a little soap box covered with felt.

Next, the bathroom.  See the little old-fashioned toilet in the back? The toilet seat part was a little creamer cup and the bathtub was made out of two little cups cut in half and glued back together to make more of an oval shape.

 The sink was made of one of those little cups that chocolates come in.

This was the other bedroom, the older sister's room. You can see the little hat on the bed and the tiny perfume bottles made from beads and pins stuck into the vanity which was made out of a tea box covered in fabric.  

Oh, and recognize that little white stand in the corner by the fireplace (made of a kleenex box)?  Thats one of those little plastic table things that comes in the middle of your pizza when its delivered.

 This is the parlor.  Another kleenex box fireplace and cardboard furniture.  The things on the wall, as well as the plants, rug and little lamp were all cutouts from magazines.  

This is the dining room.  The cake was made from a variety of lids, the top layer being a toothpaste cap. I like the chandelier, also a magazine cutout.

 And finally, the kitchen.  Actually, this isn't my favorite room because I feel like it's kind of boring, but the little sink is cute.  It's a little sauce box that you would get from someplace like McDonalds with sweet and sour sauce in it, cleaned out and put into that brown box with the "faux marble" top. 

We colored floors (wood and tile patterns) for days and used wall paper for the back wall of each room.  The frame of the house is made out of cardboard bolts that fabric is wrapped around at a fabric stores. 

I don't know where Mrs. Finley got these ideas, but I'm sure grateful I got to be in her class. 

After I moved on to fifth and sixth grade I still loved and played with my dollhouse.  With time it got moved to a corner of my closet and finally out to the garage.  Then, when my mom was here visiting a couple of weeks ago, my dad insisted she bring it to me.  The plan was that I would clean it up (it had gotten pretty dusty), take some pictures for memory's sake and then throw it away.

But now that it's here and so cute, I haven't quite been able to bring myself to just toss it out.  What do you think? To keep or not to keep?

I guess I haven't been feeling very clever lately because it has been a while since I last posted.  I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed and stressed out this past week.  I don't feel like I should though.  I mean, I only work part time and even though I'm in school full time I usually have lots of time during the day to study or get things done.  Even so, with Relief Society and other church responsibilities, plus midterms coming up (I have one tonight), and just normal life, I feel a little crazy.  

I think a big part of the stress is coming from our upcoming move and the pressure I have been feeling to find a job. I have been job searching a lot lately and have come to a realization. Going to college has not prepared me in the least for a "real" job.  As I've read countless job descriptions in the past few weeks I seem to find one thing always in common: EXPERIENCE.  Most jobs want you to have a degree, but more than that they really want you to have experience; sometimes what seems to me like an outrageous amount of experience, like 10 years.  I have worked in a variety of jobs over the past few years, but mostly just part time and not really in a job that had opportunity for a lot of growth. Still, I feel like a have a lot of experience, just maybe not a very measurable amount. So, I guess I just haven't been feeling very confident.  I know I'm a hard worker, and I know I could be trained to do anything I didn't already know how to do, but I just feel worried that my "lack" of experience is preventing me from getting a job that I really want, and would really be good at. 

This post seems to have turned into a venting session so I think I'll stop there before I start feeling too sorry for myself.  I know everything will work out in the end, I just need to have faith. So, back to this crazy thing we call life.